I dont think i can sleep.I decided to wrote about this.If you guys are my permanent readers , so you should know my status and what going on between me and him.How are our realtionship going.So that , i dont want to repeat it again.Move on >>>
I think is almost 3 month we're not texting and connecting each other.We are too busy with our school life , i think.When i said i miss him , you will think that this girl are so into this boy.Its the way i am.I'm sorry.When i loved someone.I love him with all my heart.I try not to.But,i'm stuck to it.I admit,i was the one who are really into him.I was the one who loved him more.I always be the one who loved them more.I think i'm a kind of that person.
Eventough ,i admit, I love him. I think I always will, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna wait for him.If he does'nt make an effort , why should i ?I'll always be the one who want to keep the conversation alive.It really seems like i'm crazy fuckin in love with him.it always be me who make the first step.I can be considerate if he does the same thing.But hes not.Thats why i always think "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS , I SHOULD END IT HERE".
But,when i think to give up.I remember why i held on so long on the first place.This 8 months.I held on for 8 months.I want this realationship.Maybe,it only me who want this relationship huh ? . I know you're different from any other boys.Yes,you said you are too shy to talk to me.But,please ACT LIKE A MAN when it comes to love , cant you ?
"i've said i love you,isnt enough to prove how much i love you?" << you did say that.I know you love me but sometimes i need a prove not a words.You make me look so pathetic.Honestly,you are the first boy making me like this.PATHETIC PERSON ! Do you ever think about my feelings ? Do you ever think of me ?
I've mention to you about BREAK UP.And your reaction is "WAIT ! DONT SAY LIKE THAT ! I COULD GET A HEART ATTACK YOU KNOW.HUH" . You've said that but why are you not giving any effort or hint for this realtionship go on.If you not,why should i ? Do you really want this relationship ? if not i want to end it here.There is friendship before love.BUt i dont think there is friendship after love.
I still remember the 14/11/2010 night.The night when we confessed.The night where all the secret burst out.The night where you gave me a promise.The night where we end our fight.The night where we start this love.Do you kno why i confessed ? because i'm afraid my heart will be hurt if this words are left unspoken.But now , i think i shouldnt have said what i want to said , if i didnt confess about how i felt , Maybe we're now still friends.
Its hurt sometimes to know that i always be the one who love you more.Dear,you cant expected me to be okay with everything you do just because i like you.This patient have a limit.When i said i miss you, that mean i miss the moment when we are together.It actually kills me when we dont talk.You dont make an effort to talk to me.Its like i mean NOTHING to you.Make a change boy ! If you dont want to lose me then do something or you'll never seen me again.Last quest before i sign out , Do you ever think me as your girl ? Do you ever think that i was yours ?
